Lori Deschene helps find the Tiny Buddha in all of us
Lori Deschene, founder of TinyBuddha.com, began her dynamic company in 2009 when living in San Francisco. She moved to L.A. in 2011, hosted a picnic complete with frisbees, hoola hoops and the “family picnic” has never stopped since. Lori’s TinyBuddha.com is a digital network bound through wisdom under a welcoming tent for those who want to gain or give their positive thoughts on life. But, one thing is for sure. It’s all family.
“It’s not about me. It’s about us,” proclaims Lori.
Lori has created TinyBuddha.com that has garnered 37 million views to date and grows faster each day. She readily and proudly admits that her pearls of life’s wisdom are gathered from the world of experiences and stories that are shared through her website.
Her vast network started off with a blank slate of a twitter feed. But throw in a hoola-hoop get-together, a website, Facebook page, e-newsletters, books and who knows what else, she has a B>U success worthy to share. Lori’s likes to explain how her Internet family came to be in her “line of life” analogy.
She was standing in line at the airport viewing all of its inhabitants plugged into their Internet phones. Her first instinct was to see if her phone came with any games, because she felt impatient, frustrated, and anxious. Then she looked around and realized everyone was doing the same thing. They were all in the same boat, stuck in line, and they were likely all feeling the same things—yet they were choosing to get through the moment by creating a sense of separation. She realized then there was another choice. They could use the time to connect with each other, and in doing so decide it was time well-spent.
“It would be easy to say technology was to blame for the disconnectedness, but we were all disconnected by choice. We were all choosing the sense of separation in that moment,” teaches Lori.
She explains, through her own life’s lessons, that people have a lack of connection because of their dissatisfaction. They were in line just to get through it and the technology in their hands was their tool to separate themselves not the reason. So if technology is a tool to disconnect then it can be just as good of a tool to connect. And, that’s how TinyBuddha.com came about and has become so popular.
“I hoped the site would become a place for these conversations about things we probably all deal with but don’t always feel comfortable talking about. And it wouldn’t be like a lecture hall with people talking at you like they know all the answers. It would be a place like a family where we all at least try to get and understand each other. In this way, we wouldn’t have to feel alone in the world. We’d know where never alone in the world.”
And then she says the B>U mantra of life for all to embrace whether through Lori, TinyBuddha.com, B>U or your dog.
“Doing something small is a prerequisite of doing something big.”
Lori is inspiration to all, to do. Just start out doing something and if you don’t quite know how or where to start, just ask her or any member of her TinyBuddha.com family.
We asked Lori some questions about her B>U success and here are her answers.
Why did you create Tiny Buddha?
Before I started tinybuddha.com, I was working 60+ hours/week on the web, from home. I managed content for two different websites, neither of which explored topics that mattered to me on a personal level.
B>U Feature Lori Deschene
I realized I wanted to create a website that felt more meaningful—and I knew it would revolve around three different ideas: letting go of pain, empowering ourselves to create happiness, and recognizing we are never alone with our feelings and struggles.
I’d spent over a decade struggling with depression, frequently isolating myself and feeling ashamed. It mattered to me to create a space where no one needed to feel those things—a place where we can all be honest about what we’ve been through and what we’re going through to help each other and ourselves.
When and how did you get the inspiration to create Tiny Buddha?
When I first started tweeting quotes through @tinybuddha, I didn’t yet start the site or know what it would be. Several months in, while reading other self-help blogs that each seemed to revolve around one person’s journey and expertise, I realized I wanted to launch tinybuddha.com and do things differently.
I didn’t want it to my blog, all about my story. I wanted it to be about everyone who wanted to be involved—a place where we’re all both students and teachers.
This felt more appealing to me because I didn’t feel like a guru or expert; I wanted to present myself as I am: a fellow human being who has insights to share, but also needs help and support at times.
I wanted the emphasis to be on the community, not on me as its leader.
What has your life been like since the website went live?
It’s been an exciting journey! At first, I focused solely on the site, because both of my Content Management jobs had laid just me off. I was trying to get the word out and attract writers, but it was slow going in the beginning.
Eventually, I found new paid writing work, a necessity since I wasn’t yet earning anything through Tiny Buddha; but I got such a sense of satisfaction, purpose, and pride through the site that I didn’t mind it being a labor of love.
In the past three years, there’s been a lot of growth. I now receive more than 100 monthly submissions. Whereas I once wrote a post every weekday, I now write one or two, allowing me to focus more on other writers (my original intention).
I’ve launched six eBooks and one book through a traditional publisher, Tiny Buddha: Simple Wisdom for Life’s Hard Questions. I’m now working on a second book on self-love, which will include contributions from 40 other writers.
In retrospect, I recognize that a lot has changed since I launched the site. I now focus solely on work that’s personally meaningful, and I have more balance in my schedule, since I no longer work crazy 60-hour workweeks.
The biggest improvement, however, is the level of meaningful connection I have with others. I’ve personally connected with hundreds of people, through emails and blog comments, and I know we’ve made a difference in each other’s lives.
What do you hope to accomplish?
I don’t really have a list of things or any specific one thing I hope to accomplish. I only have a purpose I hope to continually meet, and that is this: I want to wake up every day and use my skills and strengths in a way that helps people and provides me with a sense of meaning.
Sharing my stories and helping others do the same allows me to do that.
I find that if I focus on my purpose, I inevitably create and discover new opportunities and possibilities. I take it day by day, and follow my instincts.
What is your favorite quote/inspirational phrase/motivational words?
“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.”
This one spoke to me at the darkest time of my life, when I felt certain I was a failure because of my difficult circumstances. When I found this, I realized I didn’t have to see myself as the sum of my worst mistakes and their consequences. I could choose instead to see myself as the strong person who could move beyond those challenges—and maybe even create something beautiful, not in spite of them, but because of them.
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